How Do You Deal With Loneliness

Dedicated To Sally Demore who took her own life Christmas Eve 2018

      

                                                                         

I too have my momentary lapses where I feel like am all alone in this world. It is not abnormal to feel this way, the only thing you need to look out for is that it doesn’t happen regularly and at specific times of the day. 

After going through the death of my husband who I was with for the longest period in my life 35 years, I thought I had failed and that somehow I could have done better.  I found myself drifting further and further apart from the people who were once considered a part of my daily routine. Looking back now, I see I let the situation get to extreme levels of which it shouldn’t have reached.

So, how do you deal with loneliness? The type that comes from loss of a spouse or loved one? One is to stay in control of the reason that is changing your normal happy self. 

When you give the situation power over you to dictate how you feel leads to a downward spiral.

At moments of heart break it is normal to isolate oneself from people around you. It must be a natural coping mechanism humans are built with. 

Not saying you have to be around people every minute of every day, you have to enjoy your own company before others can enjoy spending time with you, so some isolation is okay.

 What one should look out for is not to let the isolation get to extremes of hours on end per day. Try as much as possible to keep your isolation to a bare minimum, you will be able to tell from your daily routine and how you normally behave.

Like I said above, human nature is to isolate when heartbreak occurs, a coping mechanism that could actually harm. 

From my own experience, at the time of my heartbreak is when I should have been around people more than seeking me time. 

Involve yourself in an activity to get to meet new people, a change from the daily routine you have could be the much deserved break you need.

Finally, the thought that you are the only one going through heartbreak should be furthest from your mind. It happens to everyone.

Dedicated To Sally Demore who took her own life Christmas Eve 2018

After my husband passed in 2015,  I very badly wanted to go to my church, I had not been there in some time due to the 24 hour care my husband required. Panic attacks, anxiety and depression was preventing me from driving until Sally reached out to me. She drove me to the church and sat with me despite it was not her faith and I was a complete stranger.  During the 3 years after my husband's death,  she sent me daily several cheerful greetings, thoughts and inspirational quotes to my messenger. 

To a wonderful lady, R.I.P. Sally.